DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY!

By Shirley M. Carolan

Ever since I lost my website last summer I’ve not written any articles for my blogs.  I want to get beyond that disappointment and loss and start writing again on a regular basis.  So here goes.

As the new year approached I decided to make new year’s goals rather than resolutions which I’ve always found too easy to break.  I set three main categories to work on:  Health and Fitness, Writing projects, and, eliminating the Clutter in my life!  Each have daily and or weekly tasks assigned.  My mantra for this year is:  “Don’t Take It Personally!”

What I’m finding out is that my health still needs a lot of patience and work to get back to where I was last September.   It’s been hard for me to accept that my health plummeted so quickly,   making daily living a real challenge.   But now I’m off the oxygen 24/7 and it turned out not to be a blot clot on my lung.  For both I’m extremely grateful.  I’ve even rejoined my local senior center and am enjoying their “fitness room” and all the modern equipment they have.

Patience is also something I’m learning along with not taking anything personally.  I find my “schedule” needs to be adjusted because my energy runs low and I can’t do all the things I’ve planned for that day.  Rather than being disappointed or giving up my goals I thank God for what I am able to accomplish daily!  This way I’ve stopped beating up on myself and am accepting that I am doing the best I can with the resources I have.

Also, I’m learning that just getting rid of the clutter needs organization, an action plan.  It can’t be done just willy nilly.  It also helps to tackle one room at a time rather than a bit here and a bit there.  This goal is something that had to take a back seat in 2009 when I was in the hospital twice with pneumonia and on oxygen 24/7 as well as in hospital with pneumonia last year.  Again, patience is what I need to pursue even this goal.

Toastmasters has been a wonderful outlet for me. In fact, it’s a way of life to me.   I missed a lot time from it last year.   I’m happy to say I’m now back at it, mentoring new people, and winning either Best Table Topics or, Best Evaluator trophies and just participating to the fullest.

Good luck on your new goals!  I hope you have a mantra for this year too?

Shirley M. Carolan, ATMG
Writer ● Speaker ● Artist
artistwithaflair@att.net
Phone/Fax: 760-732-0663

http://www.angelscross.blogspot.com
http://www.smcarolan.blogspot.com

Copyright© 2014 by Shirley M. Carolan. All rights reserved. To reprint any part of this article simply contact Shirley Carolan at artistwithaflair@att.net. Thank you.

‘TIS THE SEASON……!

Shirley M. Carolan , ATM-G

Yes, ‘tis the season to be merry and I’m doing just that.  This year I wanted to be more prepared for the upcoming holidays and I am.  No more a bystander but an active participant.  Just before Thanksgiving I stopped to buy some cards and a few poinsettias for neighbors and friends.  I had a wonderful time addressing the cards with messages unique for each person.  Then I wrapped the pots and put each in a Holiday bag and trotted off to deliver them.

First on my list was my neighbor down the street, Gayle, who has been walking my dog, Teddy, for me with her little Shih-Tzu, Maggie.  He’s gone on many play dates with Maggie and has come to love her.  Then on to my next door neighbor, Theresa, who is a very good and considerate neighbor.  Throughout the year she bakes goodies and shares them with me.  Both ladies were pleasantly surprised and it made me feel good to honor them.  The last gift I saved for my friends I would spend Thanksgiving with along with a bottle of cognac. 

I am also grateful that my health is finally on an upturn.  To be off oxygen 24/7 and not huffing and puffing my way to the mailbox to pick up my mail, or lying in a hospital bed wondering what the hell happened is like a miracle happening.  I’ve even started back doing exercises at a great fitness room at the local Oceanside Senior Center.  Their treadmills have two small fans embedded in them that can be used during exercising!  How’s that for being spoiled?

Speaking of the Oceanside Senior Center – this week when I visited I admired the lovely Holiday decorations – trees, wreaths, poinsettias, etc. The lady behind the counter asked me if I'd like to have a poinsettia.  At first I was stunned than said “Yes.”   She asked “Red or Yellow?”  Whereupon I said “Red.”  Don’t you know this kind woman gave me two pointsettias to bring home – a red and a yellow one!  How’s that for good luck!

While I still haven’t set up a new web site, since I “lost” the one I had for seven (7) years because of an error with Go Daddy back in August, I’m putting this on my goal list for 2014! I would like to learn how to do this myself and I feel it’s a goal worth my time and talents. I did hear finally from the CEO of Go Daddy, Mr. Blake Irving!  He called and apologized for the “error,” said he’d refund my money and suggested I check out www.archive.org to see if I could pull my website up.  While I still feel a piece of me is missing since I "lost" my website, I am grateful for his call.  It has renewed my faith in corporate America.  Plus, it saves my filing a complaint with the Better Business Bureau about Go Daddy.

Lastly, this week I put up my outdoor Christmas lights, wreaths, etc. Recently, I bought colored Christmas lights for a change, instead of the all white ones I've had for 13 years.  I really like the difference.  Now I'm deciding whether I should also put out the family of white rheindeer that I have.  H'm.  Next, I hope to finish the calligraphy for my Christmas cards and get them mailed.  Wow, I've never been so early or ready for the holidays - it's quite fun actually.

What's one of the most important things I've learned this year?   I’ve learned that growing older is not for sissies!  So, I’m going to dedicate my time in 2014 to keeping good health, through exercising and diet and to getting more of my writing published.  That should keep me off the streets!  What are you going to be dong?

Now on to spending a wonderful Christmas with friends!  Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all!

Shirley M. Carolan, ATMG
Writer ● Speaker ● Artist
artistwithaflair@att.net
Phone/Fax: 760-732-0663

http://www.angelscross.blogspot.com
http://www.smcarolan.blogspot.com

Copyright© 2013 by Shirley M. Carolan. All rights reserved. To reprint any part of this article simply contact Shirley Carolan at artistwithaflair@att.net. Thank you.

THAT WAS THE WEEK THAT WAS!

BY Shirley M. Carolan, ATMG

Wow, I can honestly say that this has been an incredible week!  In fact, it was a week when everything hit the fan!  First, I had a dreadful health scare followed by both my telephone and internet access down.  It was a bit scary being incommunicado from friends, relatives and associates.  I reported the phone and internet problems on Wednesday to AT&T and was told a repair man would be at my house on Friday between 8 AM and 12 Noon.  That meant another 3 days of being in limbo.

As I reflected on my situation I realized there was nothing I could do about everything that had happened.  It was time for the serenity prayer to work its magic on my frayed nerves.  In fact, I felt a bit like an alcoholic who had hit bottom and was desperately trying to make sense of things.  I realized then it could be worse and was determined to make the best of everything and stop beating up on myself.

The turning point came as I became aware that there was so much good going on in my life and the inconveniences were nothing and not worth getting in a stew over compared to all the good things.  I found a new joy in my small house, I read vociferously and thought about all the writing I could get done without interminable interruptions!  Why this was truly a blessing in disguise to be cut off from the outside world and totally dependent on one’s own. 

Ideas for short stories appeared like magic in a steady stream across my brain.  They seemed so good I don’t know why I never thought of them before.  Then it occurred to me that I was not in a censoring mode but one of acceptance and my horizons had blossomed and enlarged…

Friday the telephone repair man arrived and fixed both my phone and internet service.  He told me I didn’t need to buy the telephone equipment from Radio Shack.  Earlier in the week I ran around between Best Buy, Staples, Wal Mart and Radio Shack looking for the equipment that AT&T told me I needed to have to fix the problem.  I still haven’t recorded my message on my answering machine yet but I am enjoying the peace and quiet like never before.

Folks, I think it goes to show that out of adversity we learn how to be strong, take charge, and accept life’s inconveniences without getting in our own way and coming up with far better solutions that we ever imagined.  The next time adversity strikes I will think back on this week and realize that not every negative is about to devour me, or that I shall fall apart when things don’t go my way.  Rather, go with the flow and see what happens.  Like me, you may be very surprised at the results.

Shirley M. Carolan, ATMG
Writer ● Speaker ● Artist
artistwithaflair@att.net
Phone/Fax: 760-732-0663

http://www.shirleycarolan.com
http://www.angelscross.blogspot.com
http://www.smcarolan.blogspot.com

GO DADDY HAS TO GO!

By Shirley M. Carolan

After a beautiful and very busy summer I ran into problems with “Go Daddy” for my website hosting.  I’ve not been able to resolve a simple mistake despite a certified letter to the founder, Mr. Rob Parsons on 9/3/2013 and email to their President.  Neither man responded to my request for help.

It seems when I came out of the hospital last February my domain name and web hosting were up for renewal.  I thought I had checked the appropriate renewal boxes and paid them for continuing service for my WordPress website.  Somewhere near the end of August I discovered Go Daddy had removed my website.  When I called them I was finally informed that the renewal hosting box was not checked but a new hosting box was?

To think something so simple as applying my funds from the “new” hosting box (which I don’t have)  to my “renewal”  account would be so complicated is absolutely mindblowing!  Now they want $150.00 in fees + penalties to resurrect my website, and extra money to resurrect my domain name.

I’ve been a customer of Go Daddy since 2007 with the same website and hosting package.  Now, the parting of the ways has come.  I need to start afresh with a new, simple  website and hosting package. 

I sincerely miss all the folks, from all over the world, who have been with me since the beginning and have sent me wonderful comments about my article, seminars and book.  I hope it won’t be too long before I am up and running again with a whole new website and hosting company.   I have some great articles that I want to post and get your feedback on.

 

Stay tuned!

Shirley M. Carolan, ATMG
Writer ● Speaker ● Artist
artistwithaflair@att.net
Phone/Fax: 760-732-0663
http://www.shirleycarolan.com
http://www.angelscross.blogspot.com

http://www.smcarolan.blogspot.com

Copyright© 2013 by Shirley M. Carolan. All rights reserved. To reprint any part of this article simply contact Shirley Carolan at artistwithaflair@att.net. Thank you.

 

GOODWILL INDUSTRIES RUNS AMOK!

By Shirley M. Carolan, ATMG

Several weeks ago I was getting ready to donate some clothing and household goods to one of my favorite charities:  Goodwill Industries (in my local town).  Lo and behold Scott Pelley on the 6 PM news ran a story about the misdeeds of Goodwill Industries International who pays its disabled employees less than minimum wage, in fact some are getting less than .22₵ an hour.   I could hardly believe my ears I was so stunned.  I waited a few days expecting to hear more news about this dreadful situation and I held up my donation.

There has been no follow up that I am aware of, so last week I decided to check out some websites on my own.  Sure enough several carried stories about Goodwill Industries and its mis-treatment of employees going back several years.   Where have I been living?  Do I only read or hear what I want to read and hear?  Some of the websites I checked out were:  www.CBS.com,www.Snopes.com, Ariana Hufffington Post, www.Wikipedia.com.

Part of the problem is that Goodwill Industries uses an antiquated method of determining payment to its employees, i.e, using a provision of the federal labor law to pay workers with disabilities less than the federal minimum wage, i.e. Section 14(c) of the Fair Labor Standards Act of 1938.  Goodwill counters that these folks would not have any employment or income but for them regardless of how low the pay is.

This situation has definitely soured me on a charity I loved, shopped at, as well as donated to over many years.  It’s not like finding out there’s no Santa Claus or Tooth Fairie after all.  It’s far more serious and I hope and pray Goodwill will take positive action to correct this horrendous situation quickly. 

As a result of the above, I have called DAV (Disabled American Veterans) locally to come and pick up my donations.  They are also an excellent charity and I love hearing the ads Gary Sinese has about them and all the good they do for our veterans.

I’d love to hear from you about your thoughts on the above.  Thank you!

Shirley M. Carolan, ATMG
Writer ● Speaker ● Artist
artistwithaflair@att.net
Phone/Fax: 760-732-0663http://www.shirleycarolan.com
http://www.angelscross.blogspot.com

http://www.smcarolan.blogspot.com

Copyright© 2013 by Shirley M. Carolan. All rights reserved. To reprint any part of this article simply contact Shirley Carolan at artistwithaflair@att.net. Thank you.

THE GREAT DEBATE – TOASTMASTERS

By Shirley M. Carolan, ATM-G

My Carlsbad Toastmaster Club, Tick Talk Toastmasters, recently held a Club debate. The topic was “The Pros and Cons of Physician Assisted Suicide.”    While it is a controversial subject for many, I felt the participants excelled with dignity and compassion, and expertise in researching while sharing their feelings on this important subject.  I also feel this event will be  the highlight of our Club’s year.

Leading the debate was Deborah Corey who provided participants with Karl Popper Debate  Rules.  The debate was comprised ten parts. Six of these consisted of speeches (uninterrupted presentations by a designated speaker). The remaining four consisted of cross examination, i.e., a series of questions and answers involving one speaker from each side. There were two teams, each with three people. One team took the PRO position, and the other took the ANTI  position.  This enabled participants to focus on the core elements of a controversial issue while giving them an opportunity to follow the Karl Popper Debate Format:

•   emphasize tolerance for multiple points of view

•   emphasize the development of analytical thinking skills

•   instill in participants an appreciation for the value of teamwork

Pat Rarus was our moderator who kept things moving making sure our speakers kept within their allotted time frames and brought the meeting in on time!  We also had two evaluators giving their feedback to each team.

While I personally subscribe to the “Five Wishes” concept of how I want my final days to flow and have so notified my physician, I was deeply touched and impressed by the arguments on both sides of this controversial debate.  Their persuasion skills were outstanding.  It is also the sort of program that needs to be videotaped so future members can see how well rounded communicators we are at Tick Talk Toastmasters.

Shirley M. Carolan, ATMG

Writer ● Speaker ● Artist

artistwithaflair@att.net
Phone/Fax: 760-732-0663

http://www.shirleycarolan.com

http://www.angelscross.blogspot.com

http://www.smcarolan.blogspot.com

Copyright© 2013 by Shirley M. Carolan. All rights reserved. To reprint any part of this article simply contact Shirley Carolan at artistwithaflair@att.net. Thank you.

THE FIVE WISHES WORKSHOP

By Shirley M. Carolan, ATM-G

April, for me, ended with a bang!  One of the perks of living in the Golden Triangle (Oceanside, Carlsbad, Vista) is that the senior citizen centers have such excellent activities to enjoy and are for every lifestyle.  Once a year the Carlsbad Senior Center holds a workshop entitled “THE FIVE WISHES.”   This workshop is presented by the Elizabeth Hospice of Escondido and I attended it last year.  I liked what I heard and expected to take some action to complete my “Five Wishes”  workbook.  I never got around to doing that …

February this year an emergency hospital stay made me realize the importance and necessity of having my “Five Wishes” workbook completed, and signed by my respective designees.  So, when I heard that Carlsbad was offering this workshop again I dropped everything and signed up.  I even gave up the COPD physical therapy class that day in La Jolla to do this!

So what is the “Five Wishes” workshop all about?  Basically it encompasses the following:

1.     Listing the person I want to make “care decisions” for me when I can’t.

2.    The kind of medical treatment I want, or don’t want.

3.    How comfortable I want to be (when I reach the end of my life)

4.    How I want people to treat me.

5.    What I want my loved ones to know.

Obviously, the last three wishes deal with my personal, spiritual and emotional wishes.  And by filling out in detail what I want to happen in the event of terminal/sudden serious illness, auto accident, cardiac arrest, etc. I will be helping my family, doctors, health care providers, friends and others in knowing what my wishes are without placing added burdens on them.  This is also a wonderful booklet to use if you are thinking about donating any organs when you pass on.  It should be signed and witnessed by two other people, and a copy given to your M.D.

The Five Wishes is for anyone over 18 years old, married, single, parents, adult children, and friends.  We were supplied the booklet at the workshop but you can order it for a nominal fee through:  “Aging With Dignity” www.agingwithdignity.org. I’ve just given you a bird’s eye view here but there is so much more to read and learn.  Our presenter, Theresa Gallegos, was outstanding and had a great sense of humor!  She can be reached at:  760-519-1441 or www.elizabethhospice.org.

For you curious folks, the Five Wishes began with Jim Towey who worked closely for 12 years with Mother Teresa.  For one year he also lived in a hospice which she ran in Washington, DC  This first hand experience inspired him to write the Five Wishes.  It has received overwhelming response and has been featured on CNN,  NBC’s Today Show as well as Time and Money magazines.

Good luck and I hope you will check this out.

Shirley M. Carolan, ATMG
Writer ● Speaker ● Artist
artistwithaflair@att.net
Phone/Fax: 760-732-0663http://www.shirleycarolan.com
http://www.angelscross.blogspot.comhttp://www.smcarolan.blogspot.com

Copyright© 2013 by Shirley M. Carolan. All rights reserved. To reprint any part of this article simply contact Shirley Carolan at artistwithaflair@att.net. Thank you.